Sunday, May 30, 2010

Idol vs. God

I'm leading a Bible study with my youth girls in June over Hayley DiMarco's book Idol Girls. I'm really enjoying it so far. I've discovered that I have some idols of my own that I'm dealing with. Things that I didn't see as idols. Since God has reavealed this to me, I've been in the process of dealing with these idols and making sure God is first in everything I do. Of course, Satan knows this and has tried to use it to his advantage. He has really been hitting me hard trying to get me down and use my idols to pull me away from God. One idol I'm dealing with is my appearance. I always thought that by the time I was 30 (which I'll be next year) that I wouldn't be dealing with the same stuff my junior high and high school girls deal with. I mean, you think you would outgrow it at some point. Well, reality has hit that it probably isn't going away any time soon. I need to remember that God created me beautiful in His image. Yes, I do need to exercise daily and watch what I eat (which I'm trying really hard to do better at), but I don't need to obsess over how I look. I don't need to compare myself to anyone else. Our society doesn't help in this matter at all! You can turn on the t.v. at anytime and be smacked in the face with what they say women are supposed to look like. It's also in the stores. So many of the styles of clothes are for one body type...those with no hips, big backends and legs. All of which I may add, that I have. So where shopping once used to be enjoyable, now I dread it. Not to mention all of the 80s and 90s styles that are back in. Yuck! That's a different discussion all together, though. In addition, it seems like so many of the tops that are in style are so low-cut or tight that no one can really be comfortable in them.

In addition, I've felt so distant from God lately. I've been spending time with Him during the day, but not near as much or as meaningful as I need to be. This morning in church, He really spoke to me through the song service and through the message. He used these two songs to remind me of a few things...

Friend of God

Who am I that you are mindful of me
That you hear me when I call
Is it true that you are thinking of me
How you love me it's amazing

I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
I am a friend of God
He calls me friend

God Almighty, Lord of Glory
You have called me friend

He calls me friend
He calls me friend

Draw Me Close

Draw me close to You
Never let me go
I lay it all down again
To hear You say that I'm your friend
You are my desire
No one else will do
Cause nothing else can take Your place
To feel the warmth of your embrace
Help me find my way
Bring me back to you

Your all I want
Your all I've ever needed
Your all I want
Help me know you are near

Wow! I can't remember how many times I've sang these two songs, yet they spoke to me so deeply this morning. Our pastor preached how God is not silent. Here are a few things he said, that God used to really speak to me...

God is not withdrawn from us, but we withdraw from Him.

If I compared myself to the cosmos, I would be smaller than a grain of sand. Yet, God knows me by name!

If I'm not walking with Jesus, then I will never hear the voice of God.

Needless to say, God has not moved at all. I have moved away from Him. Not consciously, but I have still moved. So many times, I get caught up in the business of doing things...ministry, spending time with Michael and the girls, sewing, cleaning, the list could go on and on. These things are not bad, but when I don't stop to be still, spend time with God, and listen to Him, then it seems as if God isn't listening. I heard someone say a long time ago, "I want to be walking so closely to God that when He stops I bump into Him." That is my desire! Words cannot begin to describe what it was like this morning to worship my Jesus and hear from Him!!! I want more of Him!

Do I want to hear God?

You bet I do! Am I listening to Jesus? Then, I need to put Him first, spend time with Him, and rest and trust in Him. Seems like such a simple revelation. When God speaks, sooner or later you have to listen. Which will it be for me? What about you? Are you listening to God?

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Where to Start?

So much has been going on in our lives lately. I'm not really sure where to start. I'll begin with the most important part. God has placed me in a position of leadership in our MOPS group. To make a long story short, I have accepted the position as coordinator of our group. I am totally inadequate and unworthy for this position, but I am following a calling God has placed on my life. I have a passion and desire to reach out to women with young children. I pray that God will work through me and use me to reach out to others and show them His love.

My sweet little Laney turned one a few weeks ago. I'm still wondering where the past year has gone to. It's been filled with wonderful memories that I will cherish forever.

This past week has been crazy to say the least. Michael has been busy with meetings, preparing for Senior Recognition, and preparing to preach on top of everything he normally does. Laney has been sick with tonsilitis, poor baby. And my sweet Natalie has hit the terrible three's. She hasn't actually been terrible, but she has been ignoring me and disobeying quite a bit lately. I'm sure it didn't help with Laney being sick and getting lots of attention this past week. Natalie was much better today after she got some much needed attention from Grammie and Grandpa.

We watched Natalie sing at her Parent's Day Out program tonight. I can't belive her first year of "school" is almost over. Her teachers, Susan and Teresa, have been wonderful! Along with our director, DeAnne. I can't begin to thank them enough for all they do for my little girls. They love on both of them. Natalie has learned so much this past year. I'm sad that her first year is coming to an end, but excited that we'll be able to spend more time together.

Lastly, I've still been working on some crafts as usual. The latest projects are mother's day bags, another clipboard, bags for MOPS, bows for the girls, and a flowergirl's dress for Natalie for my little bro's wedding.

Whew! I'm ready for a vacation! Just two and a half more weeks! We are taking the girls camping at Tyler State Park. I'm so excited! Just us and the outdoors with no distractions and business.

My prayer is that among all the business I don't lose sight of my Creator, Father and Friend. He has given me so many desires and passions. I don't ever want to get so involved with activities that I lose sight of my first passion-JESUS!